Last Days in the Hospital
The last few days in the hospital were a bit rough for me emotionally. I was at the point where I was mentally exhausted and did not want to see those same four walls for another night. I was restless and I was also scared. Every morning at 4:00 am the vampires (phlebotomists that draw my blood) came to take blood...then a few hours later the new nurse would come in to introduce herself...then a few hours later I would be waiting around with the fear inside me that they would come and get me for dialysis because it had been a few days since I last went. My doctors would come in at random times in the morning so all I did was play the waiting game. My nephrologists (kidney doctors) continued to come in with good news for me. My kidneys were recovering...and there was a very high possibility that I no longer needed dialysis. Then more good news came...the dialysis tube was going to come out of my neck!!! Granted...it took them some time to finally get around to taking it out because they kept getting called away, but he finally came! I was free of all tubes and IV's and needles!
There was a time when I was walking around with my brother and we were talking and that is when I realized that there were some things that I do not remember while being in the hospital. Such as, how I ended up in ICU...I do not remember being transported there. I do not remember part of the events during the bad reaction to the IVIG. There are days that were just lost in my memory because I had been there for so long.
The day before my actual discharge I was told that there was a possibility I would be discharged that day. So I called my father and told him to hurry to the hospital because I was being discharged. I packed up all of my things and was ready to go. I was overjoyed and overwhelmed. But then...they decided to keep me one more night. I instantly became heartbroken and tears were flowing from my eyes. I was upset and did not feel like listening to anything that anyone had to say. I had gotten my hopes up for absolutely no reason. I felt like my world had came crashing down. This same day was the day that I started physical therapy. This was a very emotional experience for me because I was able to walk myself into the hospital and I could barely walk myself out. My physical therapist put me on a walker because my entire balance was off. I was weak. We attempted to go up some stairs and I could only make it up 5 steps before my legs began to cramp. Reality began to set in. I had a long recovery period ahead of me. Then I was told that I had to go home with a walker and a shower seat. I felt like I was an old lady. It was very frustrating.
The next day was discharge day! It was the day I was being released from jail! I woke up super early and just waited around. I was antsy! When the time came...I broke down again. I could not believe that after all these weeks I was finally leaving. I was going home to my OWN house, OWN bed, OWN bathroom, and to freedom to move around as I please. I felt like it was my birthday or Christmas came early. I would finally walk around in fresh air! The ride home was interesting...things in downtown looked a bit different and construction sites that I remember...had been finished! It almost felt like it was my first time in downtown and my hometown. I had been gone that long!
I AM FREE!
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